Why I'm Going to Buy Some Effing Paper Towels

I'm going to buy some F#!*ing paper towels.

I haven't bought paper towels since before December. I transitioned to using rags (torn up T-shirts and towels) for clean up, rather than paper towels, almost a year ago. It took a little getting used to at first -- cleaning up a mess on the floor with a reusable towel is weird in the beginning. In a world where there are disposable wipes, towels, mops, and dusters, using a cloth towel just seems ... well, weird.

But I got used to it. I had come to believe that paper towels, killing all those trees, had no place in this world.

That was until today.

Dateline: Houston, 7 a.m.

I got up and began to make coffee. I'm not going to lie. I'm a clumsy girl. I accidentally bashed the coffee decanter against the sink and ka-pow! glass and yesterday's coffee dregs went flying. Luckily, even though I'd just rolled out of bed and was barefoot, I got only a scratch on the pad of my finger. A fair amount of blood, but nothing serious.

I spent a half hour cleaning up the glass and drips of coffee, thinking to myself that I wished I had some paper towels. But I had a sponge and (yes, very ungreen of me) a disposable mop. Everything clean and spanky by 7:30 a.m.

Dateline: Houston, 8:30 p.m.

I'm doing the dishes after a rock 'em, sock 'em Gleetini Night (2 oz. vodka, 1.5 oz. Godiva liqueur, 1.5 oz espresso, 1 oz milk -- shake with ice and strain into two glasses. It's like an amazing coffee milkshake). I noticed a little drop of blood on the kitchen floor.

Turns out, I'd nicked my toe on a little piece of glass that I'd missed during the morning, and by the time I'd figured it out, I'd trailed blood all over the house (yes, TMI, charming, I understand).

What's a green girl to do? I didn't want to use sponges on the floor, and rags would be stained by the blood. And there were NO PAPER TOWELS.

So I did the next best thing -- got a wad of toilet paper and got to work.

But I'm going to be purchasing a roll of paper towels. Not for every day use, just for the days that begin with an exploded coffee pot and end with the trail of blood droplets, a la some British mystery series.